The Never Ending To-Do List
How to Deal with Overwhelm During the Holidays
There is no doubt that your already full ‘to do list’ is now overflowing with the approach of the holidays and year end. This can be overwhelming and many of us deal with overwhelm by paralysis, caffeine or overwork. Neither of which result in improved productivity, mental health or enjoyment of the holiday season.
So how do we tackle that never ending ‘to do’ list?
How Do You Do It?
Here is your step by step guide to start getting you out of survival mode, even when things are still changing and uncertain.
There are a lot of steps here! Even if you can choose 1 or 5 of them, you will see a difference. These won’t fix everything, but consider them like small pressure relief valves.
Say No
Seems simple enough but if you have an ounce of people pleasing in your nature and autopilot is set to say yes, then it can be challenging. Here is a quick How to say no without burning bridges, to have easy access and direct sentences to copy paste. This is a way to protect your time, energy and effort for what are priorities for your work and non work.
Negative Consumption
Our consumption extends beyond just our diet; it encompasses what we see and hear, which wields a more significant influence than you might realize. Algorithms vie for our attention, often reinforcing our existing beliefs or predicting our clicks.
If your iPhone screen time has been steadily increasing during the pandemic, it's time to regain control. Consciously curate your news feed and regulate your exposure to negative news. This extends to your choice of company.
Here's how to manage this:
Media tends to emphasize negativity for more clicks, impacting our outlook. While staying informed is essential, set time boundaries—ten minutes at the start and end of your day.
Social media can overwhelm us, with excessive scrolling, especially before bedtime, leading to diminished well-being. Consider limiting your daily usage to, say, 20 minutes or block these platforms on certain devices. Remember, these companies profit from your attention; it's time to take charge and make them work for you.
If you own an iPhone or Android, you can track and manage your screen time using the built-in features that inform you of your usage.
Delegate, Pause, or Get Help
Review your to-do lists.
Simplify your workload! Even though you're undoubtedly an independent and self-reliant individual, life, especially during tough times, isn't meant to be tackled alone. Identify tasks you can temporarily pause, delegate, or seek assistance for. Here are some examples:
Pause (temporary break):
Board memberships
Committee involvement
Children's activities
DIY projects
Delegate/Outsource:
Cleaning
Dog walking
Household chores
Home/online school support
Cooking
Seek Assistance:
When certain tasks can't be entirely removed from your plate, consider age-appropriate involvement from people in your life. For instance, children can contribute in small but helpful ways, such as running errands around the house. Remember that your well-being matters, and those around you are willing to support you in performing at your best. Don't hesitate to request the help or flexibility you need, whether it involves adjusting deadlines, rescheduling meetings, or altering your work hours. Your loved ones prioritize your welfare above all else, so speak up about your needs!
Drains & Charges
All behaviours, tasks, environments and people we engage with either drain or charge us (take away energy or add it). Now, this does not mean you like or don’t like the activities.
Example: I absolutely love keynoting. It is one of my favourite parts of my job, but due to the energy, enthusiasm and cortisol spike when I get on stage it is a drain and I need to recover after.
The idea is we need a variety of drains and charges throughout the day. I have started labeling them different colours in my calendar. Charges are blue. No blue in my schedule? I have to reschedule for my productivity, energy, mood and wellbeing.
Let It Go
Like Elsa from Frozen we need to LET IT GO!
What expectations or perfectionism can you decrease in the moment? What I mean by this is, for example, I have had to let go of the expectation of in person meetings for the foreseeable future. After 7 recently canceled conferences, I have let that go. I have let go of my expectation of a clean house with 5 people living almost 24/7 in the house and two massive dogs. I was running around like a chicken sans head cleaning up after people until it became too much.
I let the expectations go, made a chore chart, and hired a cleaner.
Reframe
Perspective matters. Now, I am not saying to think everything is roses. It isn’t; much of this is terrible. There is no way around it. Can you find something light or positive in it all? Can you get yourself to focus on what is good instead of ruminating on what isn’t?
This has a profound impact on your experience.
Example: I was just stuck in a town, 4 hours from my home, with food poisoning. It was terrible! But it was the reality I was in. So, I got a hotel, and got myself as comfortable as possible. Now, less green, I can be thankful I wasn’t ON the highway when I got sick and appreciate some quiet, resting hours (note: the 2 children under the age of 5).
Hope and humour go a long way (so says the research). Embrace them.
Self Reflection
Self reflection is key but often, especially in periods of stress we don’t practice it. And it is exactly that; a practice. Self reflection and solitude is what it can take to truly process emotions, strategize and learn. This can be practiced when you have a wellness day or for me it is not much (but what I can fit in) 5 minutes of journaling at the beginning and end of each day.
For added benefit, add an element of gratitude. This can be challenging sometimes but even searching for something to be grateful for can change your brain and get you out of cynicism.
Move
The way our body’s were built and has passed the test of time is when we encounter stress we were supposed to fight or flee. Now, our stressors aren’t saber-tooth tigers, but difficult clients or deadlines. In order to close the stress loop they have created, we need to MOVE. Get up from your chair, run on the spot, go for a walk, have a dance party as needed and if possible, end your day with 10-20 minutes of exercise.
Be creative!
More than anything, please remember you ARE NOT ALONE. Let others help by thinking through how to do the above by helping you lift whatever it is you are carrying or sitting beside you in the dark. Often during stress, we cannot always see the big picture or possibilities. And of course, two heads are better than one! In return, when you can, help someone else. We are in this together.
We may not all be in the same boat, but we are certainly in the same storm.
Are you ready to embrace the magic of the holiday season? 🎄
Our "Slow Down for Christmas" card is a gentle reminder to take a pause and appreciate the joy, love, and warmth that this season brings.
Inside, you'll find a friendly prompt to practice mindfulness with a quick 5 Senses exercise. Whether you send it to friends, family, or colleagues, this card carries the spirit of connection and caring.
Order today and receive your downloadable file instantly! Print and send to a special person in your life this holiday season!
Dr. Lisa Belanger
Lisa has a Ph.D. in Behavioural Medicine, an Executive MBA, and is a Certified Exercise Physiologist and High Performance Specialist.
Slow Down for Christmas!
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